So.
Yeah....
I tried to gather my thoughts, but it didn't work. I'm just going to type things as I remember them, and since I'm tired as hell, it probably won't be the easiest post to read. However, I promised that I'd post about my new year's eve experience so until I get around to editing, this is me apologizing for the poor grammar, punctuation, and spelling.
Sorry.
It started out looking like it was going to be an awful night at work. My boss called me around 4:00pm to tell me that I was coming up on 50 hours this week, and asked me if I wanted to come in or not. Obviously I declined the opportunity to work on NYE, and tagged along with my friends instead.
The events leading to the ball drop on new year's eve were great fun, and as usual, I spent that time with my closest and most awesomest friends. We drank, danced, and participating in copious amounts of debauchery from about 10:00pm to just after 1:00am. However, the real fun didn't start until I got back to Sam's place.
This was my first new year's eve, as far as I can remember, being single. And there aren't many occasions that are as awkward to be single on as new year's eve. Everyone is romantically kissing their partner at midnight and you're just standing there, drink in hand, watching in envy, and wishing somebody special was by your side.
It's especially awkward when your group of friends only has one other single person in it.
It's even more awkward when she's someone you've been infatuated with from the moment you set eyes on her. Which was... Oh, I don't know. Let's say four or five years ago?
It's even more awkward when she glances over from across the room and notices you smiling at her for no reason.
It's EVEN MORE AWKWARD when she can probably tell by the look on your face that you're fully zoned out, undressing her in your mind, and fawning over her body.
Infatuation is probably an understatement, but I've always had a thing for Samantha. Seriously. Since the moment we first met, I was completely head over heels. She's absolutely gorgeous and has an awesome personalty, but she's not into girls (especially not me), and I've never had the courage to act on any flirting or affection that she's aimed my way.
I'll try and describe her without sounding like a stalker. She's my height (5' 9"), which makes eye/face contact easy. She's my weight (~110 lbs), which makes other things easy and fun... Haha. She has short, dirty blonde hair that constantly falls down over her eyes, and with THE CUTEST little flip of her neck, she flicks it back into place. All of that wrapped with amazing fashion sense, full of charisma, and oozing sex appeal.
Anyways, she catches me staring at her, makes her way towards me through the crowd of intoxicated party people, kisses me on the cheek, wraps her arms around me, and shouts, "HAPPY NEW YEAR, NIKKKKKKKIII!" She has no idea that I'm dying in her arms as I squeeze her against myself and wish her the same. She pulls away, runs her hand down my arm, finds my hand, and pulls me into the crowd. We go from friend to friend, some strangers included, hugging, celebrating, and wishing everyone a happy new year.
When the excitement of 2011 changing to 2012 dies down, everyone goes back to dancing with their partners and all that romantic new year's eve stuff continues on. Instead of standing around and feeling out of place, I start dancing with Sam. With the courage provided by alcohol and lust, I find myself flirting a bit. Sam is a couple of drinks past a heavy buzz, flirts right back, and after about twenty minutes, she's exploring my body with her hands and kissing my neck and clavicle. I'm seriously falling in love on the dance floor.
1:00am rolls around, I'm sobering up, the crowd is thinning, everyone is exhausted, my friends are leaving, and as we're walking to our cars, all I can think about is not wanting this night to end.
Sam picked me up and drove to the bar, but she was in no condition to drive back home. I probably shouldn't have, but I drove her car back to her apartment.
As I park her car, she insists that I'm in no condition to drive home, and literally pulls me up the stairs to her apartment. Yeah, I'm infatuated, but my logical side is telling her that I need to go home. Either way, I have to go upstairs to let her into her apartment. She gets the door open, turns towards me, and the look on her face instantly changed my mind; I don't want to go home anymore.
Her hands started at my waist, slid up my back from under my shirt, and curled over my shoulders. I closed my eyes and melted in her arms as she kissed me.
Logic: OFF
Lust: FULL BLAST
Long story short, I kinda maybe kissed Sam and we kinda maybe woke up naked in her bed. It was the most intimate experience of my entire life.
I'll tell you about new year's day tomorrow.
I'm too tired to type any more.
I just want to cuddle.
